Adult-child bonding achieves results. "Skin," the live action short film that won an Academy Award last month, featured a father proudly training his son to master a gun and hate black people. Through a plot twist and a bit of Hollywood magic, the father's skin turns black. His son shoots and kills him.
Research by the National Scientific Council on the Developing Child also found a lack of adult-child bonding in abusive environments and those with uncaring adults leads to kids with no motivation to learn, to explore, or to try new things. In a negative situation, kids can become fixated on fear, avoiding punishment, and the immediate danger of failure.
When children lack positive experiences with adults, they are apt to resist pressure to do things in a particular way, such as form cursive letters according to a prescribed method. Even guiding some children through mindfulness by requiring them to close eyes, sit up straight, and conform to other unnecessary procedures can undermine the positive benefits of mindfulness.
Teachers need to realize not all kids come into a room with a background of adult-child relationships that make them ready to answer an adult's question, volunteer an opinion, or ask for more information. A teacher needs to find ways to help students succeed, to feel a task is not impossible. It helps to lead into discussions with phrases like "I notice" and "I wonder." In other words, teachers need to give the impression all ideas are welcome and all subjects are worth exploring.
My mother was a math teacher who always tried to figure out what students were doing when they arrived at the wrong answer. She learned there were lots of things you could do with a column of numbers. "That's interesting," she would say, "I never thought of that." No matter how "crazy" a student's manipulation of numbers was, she'd caution other students not to laugh before they listened to and understood a classmate's reasoning.
Not every student is going to be good or poor at the same subject. Unless all kids begin to develop positive face-to-face interactions with adults, they may shut down and stop learning before they hit their strides. This goes for gifted and talented kids also. When an eight-year-old British boy, with Egyptian parents, perfect pitch, a knack for coding, and a sense of humor, told an international education conference, "(G)etting a few spelling words or facts wrong is not the end of the world," teachers needed to avoid taking offense. He also felt free to suggest learning to type on a keyboard saved trees and was more important in the digital age than learning cursive.
No comments:
Post a Comment