Look Beyond One Right Way

A review of a new book about the US artist, Alexander Calder, described how he employed physics in the service of art. Reading this, I was reminded that my sister, who has an art major degree. looked at a drawing of the coronavirus and saw a similarity with the look of the Times Square ball that drops on New Year's.

     Science, it seems, also could be employed in the service of art. Picture how the motion of constantly copying genes could be expressed the way Calder incorporated motion in his art.

     Every field can be expressed in art. If employees were encouraged to design and decorate their cubicles, the idea of dressing to express on casual Fridays might lead to occasional happy hour tours of minimal and exuberant art in employee spaces. Consider the variety of ways food can be arranged on a plate; how politicians around the world express their policies in the green, pink, yellow and red-white-and-blue graphics on their campaign posters; and how the pattern of interstate roads moves the eye across a country like the lines on a Mondrian painting.

     "(I)t is only in being creative that the individual discovers the self," said British psychoanalyst, Donald Winnicott. Viewed this way, laughing at and ignoring an individual's creative spirit stifles growth and development. Hitler may not have been a great artist, but wouldn't humanity have been better off if he expressed himself in art rather than in creating the "final solution"?

     Family life could be much fuller and much more satisfying, if each member were encouraged to create. It is easy to laugh at a relative's out-of-the-box ideas and creations, but during the coronavirus lockdown, we have seen the joy of family members taking videos, dancing, singing, playing musical instruments, taking photos out of windows, painting, cooking, reciting original poems, sewing colorful protective masks, and tailoring outfits for pets. Some people have the confidence to never doubt themselves, but being laughed at is enough to discourage the creativity of most.

       Finally, observation helps nurture creative expression the way my sister connected seeing  a drawing of COVID-19 with the Times Square ball. When Calder awoke on the deck of a ship one day, he saw a red sunrise on one side and a silvery moon on the other. In the solar system, he realized two very different phenomena are related, just as the moving parts and shapes on his mobiles would   be connected later.

     Encouraging observation and nurturing creative expression beyond one already established right way of doing something can benefit self, family and maybe even humanity.

Grandmotherly Love

In a country of 16.5 million, Zimbabwe psychiatrist Dr. Dixon Chibanda suspected grandmothers could supplement the limited attention the country's twelve trained psychiatrists provided those with depression and mental problems.

     What gave Dr. Chibanda the idea for his Friendship Bench organization was the way grandmothers took time to listen and guide, rather than tell people what to do. According to an article in TIME magazine (February 18 - 25, 2019), the medical journal, JAMA, in 2016 reported the positive benefits of the Friendship Bench approach to training grandmothers to provide role-playing and other behavior therapies.

     For everyone who has tried to teach a grandparent to send an email or use a smartphone, the wisdom of elders seems outdated. In the area of interpersonal relations, however, who is a better adviser than someone married for 40 or 50 years? For some suffering mental anguish, "forgive and forget" might be the best message. But "forgive and remember tomorrow is another day" is often more appropriate.

      Grandmothers offer immediate appointments, when the decision to live or not live is about to be made in the heat of the moment. They also serve cookies and tea or wine and cheese.

      From their years of experience, grandmothers can dredge up examples of how they or their best friends have survived similar thoughts of suicide, being gay, having an abortion, killing screaming kids, gaining weight, growing older, or a spouse cheating on or ignoring them. They also know the child who says "I hate you" or "F... you" will need a hug or to borrow the car minutes later.

     Grandmothers have suffered financial and overbooked woes that have eased or prompted a necessary review of priorities. They know someone who you never expected will step up when you need help, that prayer works, and that there's a way to handle almost anything, because, like the commercial says, they've seen a thing or two.

     They know how to love. And they love you.

     Grandfathers are great, too, but that's another story.

Themes for Global Advertising

Leading up to any big holiday, we are used to seeing companies run ads featuring family and friends gathering to celebrate. When Singtel, a telecom company in Singapore, ran a Chinese New Year's ad that captured today's alternate reality, according to trendwatching.com, the ad outdrew those of competitors and scored nine million views on Facebook. Singtel's ad recognized how distance and busy, professional careers separate and sadden both parents and their "children" nowadays. The company captured this emotional longing to get together by showing the conversations, when plans to share the holiday were canceled. Greeting card companies also have a knack for helping family and friends share holidays, birthdays, sympathy and other emotions across the miles.

     In Singapore, Singtel found half of the population spent less than 36 hours each week with family members. I suspect that seems like a lot of time to empty nesters and young professionals alike. No advertiser wants to blatantly call, "Hey, you lonely people out there, do this," but, if you closely consider commercials, you'll see some ads show a satisfying life setting when someone is by themselves and others show the benefit of making an effort to get out to meet up with family and friends. Have a piece of candy; plan a party.